A wife may learn how to form her husband’s happiness;
in what direction the secret of his comfort lies; she must not cherish
his weaknesses by working upon them; she must not rashly run counter to
his prejudices. Her motto must be, never to irritate. She must study never
to draw largely upon the small stock of patience in man’s nature,
nor to increase his obstinacy by trying to drive him; never if possible,
to have scenes. I doubt much if a real quarrel, even if made up, does
not loosen the bond between man and wife, and sometimes, unless the affection
of both be very sincere, lastingly. If irritation should occur, a woman
must expect to hear from most men a strength and vehemence of language
far more than the occasion requires. Mild as well as stern men are prone
to this exaggeration of language; let not a woman be tempted ever to say
anything sarcastic or violent in retaliation. The bitterest repentance
must needs follow such an indulgence, if she do. Men frequently forget
what they have themselves said, but seldom what is uttered by their wives.
They are grateful, too, for forbearance in such cases; for, whilst asserting
most loudly that they are right, they are often conscious that they are
wrong. Give a little time, as the greatest boon you can bestow, to irritated
feelings of your husband. – The English Matron.
