EXPLAINING TO THE CHILDREN –
A gentleman on board a steamboat with his family, was asked by his children
“what made the boat go,” when he gave them a very minute description
of the machinery and its principles in the following words:- “You
see, my dears, this thingumbob here goes down through that hole and fastens
the jigmaree, and that connects with the – crinkum-crankum, and
then that man, he’s the engineer you know, kind o’ stirs up
the what-do-you-call-it, with a long poker, and they all shove along,
and the boat goes a-head.”
LAST ADMONITIONS TO A LAZY BOY. – A late reverend
clergyman, who was as well know for his eccentricity as his talents, one
day sent his son, a lazy lad, about twelve years of age, to catch his
horse. The boy went sauntering along half asleep with an ear of corn in
one hand, and the bridle in the other, dragging the reins on the ground.
“Thomas!” said his father, calling after him in a solemn tone
of voice – “come here, Thomas, I want to say a word to you
before you go.” The lad returned, and the parson proceeded. “You
know, Thomas, I have given you a great deal of good counsel. You know
I’ve taught you before closing your eyes always to say, `Now I lay
me down to sleep,’ &c., besides a good many other things in
the way of exhortation and advice. But this is the last opportunity I
shall ever have of speaking to you, and I couldn't let it pass without
giving you my parting advice. Be a good boy, Thomas, and always say that
pretty prayer when you are going to sleep. I fear I shall never see you
again.” As he said this in a very grave and solemn manner, the poor
boy began to be frightened, and burst into tears with this exclamation,
“You’ll never see me again, pa?” – “No;
for I shall die before you get back with the horse!” This quickened
Thomas’s ideas; and gathering up the bridle-reins, he ran and caught
the horse sooner than he had ever done before.
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